All Of The Songs
by herbrightblueeyes
Summary: A collection of Fourtris one-shots inspired by songs.
1. Everywhere

**A/N: I** was supposed to just let these drabbles stay on Tumblr, but some of you requested I put it up here, too, so, yeah, there. I don't know how often I'll be able to update this since I only write these shorts when inspiration strike. Right now, there are three of these including this one. I'll post the other two sometime within today or tomorrow, but I'll have to read through them again and see if there's anything else I could do to improve them.

This one is inspired by Vampire Weekend's version "Everywhere" (original by Fleetwood Mac). Just your fluffy, high school Fourtris drabble to start this off. As usual, reviews are greatly appreciated. I hope this makes waiting for FYWB's updates a little bit easier.

Enjoy! =)

* * *

Four leans his whole body against the wall – drink in hand, eyes wandering around the school gym which they've transformed into a dance floor for the night. It's the only place they could get for free in such short notice but that doesn't matter now, people came and filled it. This whole fundraiser for Shauna's treatment is a success. He continues scanning the whole place looking for one specific person. He finally finds her on the other side of the room laughing heartily with her best friend.

"God, she's so beautiful," he mutters to himself with a sigh.

"This next song goes to my dear old friend Four who has been staring at Tris for two hours now. Dude, staring is for creeps. Go and make your fucking move," Zeke says on the microphone as he puts on the next song. Ms. Wu, their art teacher, glares at him from the side of the makeshift DJ booth. His best friend mouths _'sorry'_ and gives her his trademark white-teeth grin.

Vampire Weekend's version of Fleetwood Mac's _Everywhere _starts playing.

Four stands there, frozen on his spot. He turns a little to look at his best friend. He meant to give him one the death glares he usually uses to silence his rowdy teammates in the basketball team but he only manages to throw him a disbelieving look. Zeke had teased him endlessly about his crush on the pretty freshman but he never thought he'd broadcast it to the whole damned school. He looks down avoiding everyone's eyes. The attention they're giving him right now feels heavier than an actual spotlight on his shoulders.

He has been contemplating how to run out of the gym without being noticed when a pair of yellow sneakers stops right in front of him. Four looks up to see a smiling Tris. She looks shy and unsure.

"Hi," she says, "I think your friend is pairing us up." She bites her lower lip.

"Yeah," he chuckles under his breath. He looks at where Zeke is stationed above everyone else. He raises one eyebrow before mouthing _'Go on' _encouragingly. It's not ideal, definitely far from how he wants to be introduced to her but it's what he was given and he'll take his chance. "I'm Four," he puts out his hand for her to take and shake, and she does.

"I know. Everyone here knows you." Tris tucks loose strands of hair behind her ear. It looks so soft. Oh, what he'd do just to run his fingers through it.

"So, do you want to dance?" Tobias asks hoping she'll say yes.

She nods and smiles at him. Four holds back his grin, instead taking her hand in his. Maybe after this dance he can talk to her longer, exchange numbers with her. Definitely, after tonight, he'd stop being a coward and finally ask her out.


	2. Tell Her You Love Her

**A/N:** As much as I love the Divergent series, I am erasing Allegiant from my mind. In my head, Tris is still alive, and she and Tobias are still together. This drabble was inspired by Echosmith's "Tell Her You Love Her". Just some father-son conversation for you guys.

BTW, if you want to listen to the songs I've been (and will be) mentioning, I've posted them on my tumblr page - herbrightoceaneyes. Just go to the 'music and stories' tag.

* * *

"Would you want coffee or tea or hot chocolate?" Tris asks Tobias from the doorway to his home office. It's a Saturday and he knows he shouldn't be working, but the pile of folders and papers in front of him beg his immediate attention. If only the city budget meeting isn't on Monday, he'll gladly spend the day outside –a picnic maybe, they hadn't done that in a while – with his family. He's lucky Tris had always been understanding.

"Coffee," he smiles at her. "I kind of need to wake up my brain."

"Yeah, I got that." His wife chuckles lightly. "So, coffee for both of my boys." She walks out of the room shaking her head in amusement. Tobias turns his attention back to the computer screen, but every now and then he glances at his son, Andrew, who has taken over the opposite corner of the room. He has his book open on the same page for half an hour now, and he has been checking his phone constantly.

"You know, it'd be easier if you just send whoever you're thinking about right now a message," Tobias says in a serious voice. He bites the inside of his lower lip to stop himself from smiling. "That way you'll get out what's in your head and you'll be able to really study."

"Dad, I'm not…" Andrew starts to say, but he cuts himself off. "No, I'll just go back to reading."

"You know you can tell me anything." Tobias turns away from his computer and looks at his eldest. Andrew looks a lot like him, but with Tris' stormy blue eyes. "I know it's about a girl."

Surprise and nervousness takes over his son's face. "No…no it's not," Andrew stutters.

"Your mom knows about it, too. She saw the note you wrote to her, to Kate. It fell from one of your books," Tobias teases Andrew, the young man blushes red. "You didn't give it, I think."

"No," his son shakes his head.

"Why?"

"You won't tell mom?" Tobias smiles and nods.

"I'm scared I'll scare her away. She's one of my closest friends and I don't want to ruin that," Andrew confesses.

Tobias laughs lightly. "I was like you with your mom," he says thinking back to that time when he was 18 and Tris was 16. It's been 23 years now. "I wasn't sure she'd return the feelings, but I took my chance." He remembers his fear landscape, the tentative flirting, the chasm, their first kiss; it brings a smile to his face. "At first I told her I like her. Your mom had to encourage me a bit before I told her I love her."

"Really?" Andrew asks, eyes attentive.

"Really," he answers. "She didn't say it back right then. It took your mom a longer time to tell me she loves me back, but she did eventually and it was worth waiting."

"Do you think it'd be the same for me, dad?" Andrew inquires.

"I don't know, but it's worth the try." Tobias can't believe he's doing this, dispensing love advice to his son. "You wouldn't know her answer if you won't tell her. And maybe like your mom, she'll need time, too."

Just then, Tris comes back to the room. "What about me needing time?" She eyes both of them.

"Needing time to make our coffee," Tobias meets her halfway through the room and gets the tray from her. "And sandwiches."

"I thought you'd be hungry," Tris shrugs. "I'll go to the market with Dani. We'll meet Christina and Shauna there. You boys just heat last night's dinner for your lunch. There's still plenty."

"Okay." Tobias kisses Tris lightly on her lips. "Take care."

"I feel like you two have been talking about me," Tris tells him and Andrew. She looks at their son longer, maybe hoping he'll spill their conversation. "You won't tell me now, that's fine. I'll find out soon enough." Tris kisses his cheeks. "See you later." Tobias and Andrew watch Tris walk out.

"Dad?" Andrew says after a while.

"Yes, son?"

"Thank you." The young man smiles; Tobias returns it.

"Tell me what happens, alright?"


	3. Can't Let Go

**A/N:** This is the last one of my pre-written song fics/drabbles. I'm working on a new one. Hopefully I get to finish it tomorrow. To the people who've followed this series, thank you and also thank you for the reviews. I want you to know that I appreciate it.

This one was inspired by Landon Pigg's "Can't Let Go." I'm at tumblr - herbrightoceaneyes.

* * *

Cans of beer litter the floor of Lauren's studio apartment. It's a Saturday, and this, drinking until they pass out, was their idea of fun. It's a nice break from school and work, from his fucked up family and all his worries. It's just him and Zeke and Lauren drinking night away – the modern day equivalent of Dumas's musketeers only they don't really do much good. Tobias thinks again then shakes his head. No, no good at all. _Youth is wasted on the young_, they say. Whoever they are, they might just be right.

"So," Zeke lengthens the word trying to emphasize it but only succeeding at showing how drunk he is, "let's talk about love."

"Not again," Lauren drags a hand from her forehead to her cheek to her chin. Among the three of them, she is the most sober. "I cannot count how many times I've heard all your shitty stories about how Shauna left you, Ezekiel."

"Because she did left me, Lo," Zeke says offended, "but I won't be talking. Four here hasn't shared anything about his love life and we've been friends for more than a decade now."

Lauren's eyebrows shoot up. "Yeah," she says nodding, "why haven't we heard about any girl, Four? Do you have other friends you confide to?" She finishes feigning hurt.

"That's because there is no girl," Tobias answers with an even voice.

"I don't fucking believe you. Captain of the basketball team, one of the top students in our school. You're a liar," Lauren smacks his arm.

"He got girls all over him all the time, even now at Northwestern," Zeke seconds.

"There really was no one."

"Not even anyone close to being a someone?" Lauren asks and it makes Tobias remember her. Tris. It's been a year since he last saw her and she was dating this Robert guy from their class. She and her whole family moved out to San Francisco recently because of her dad's job.

"Well, there was this girl," he starts. Lauren and Zeke zoom in on him, all focused.

They were never really together. Yeah, they went out a couple of times but they never really had a label for what they had. Heck, they did not even talk about it, and when he tried she just distanced herself from him. He took that as her way of telling him that she wasn't interested.

And he told Zeke and Lauren all these. Under normal circumstances, he wouldn't have even think about confessing to them, but there's alcohol running through his veins and it makes him braver than he really is.

"You mean, Tris? Tris Prior? Mrs. Prior's daughter?" Zeke asks.

Mrs. Prior taught in their high school. She was one of the nicer teachers. "Yeah," he confirms, "that Tris Prior."

"When did this happen? Why don't I know about it?" Zeke and Lauren both look at him. His story seems to have sobered them up.

"Summer after graduation. It lasted well into the first month of college."

"And you didn't try to get her back? You just let it die?" Lauren's eyebrows are furrowed.

"She didn't want me that was clear enough. Why should I force myself on her?"

"Both of you are idiots, you know that?" She throws an empty can of beer at Zeke and him. "You," she turns to his best friend, "could have gotten back with Shauna but you're fucking too proud to admit that you did her wrong. My god Zeke, you've been flirting with random girls all the time, I would have left you, too, if I were Shauna. And you," she twists to face him, "Maybe Tris was just scared. You could have waited for her. You didn't have to freaking disappear on her."

Zeke and Tobias share a look. They can't believe this is happening. Lauren gave them a huge whooping without even lifting a finger. Well, that is if you disregard the can-throwing.

"God, what did I do wrong? Why am I friends with these cowards?" Lauren says to no one in particular.

"Hey," Zeke puts a hand on Tobias's shoulder. "I may just have the solution for your Tris Prior problem."

"What?"

"Uriah is friends with her. Let's get her number from him and you'll take it from there." Zeke grins.

"And I'll set you up with Shauna so you can talk to her again," Tobias grins back.


	4. You Belong With Me

**A/N:** This one got really long, but I don't mind. It was fun writing it. Anyway, this was inspired by Taylor Swift's "_You Belong With Me"_. I hope you guys like it, especially **_T__risaba Daph Ride 464_**, who requested for it.

Again, thank you for the follows and reviews. =)

I'm re-posting it again because, for some reason, it won't show up on my browser. Sorry if you get 2 notifications about this chapter.

* * *

"Just a few more seconds. And, there done. Go check it out now," Tris tells Tobias over the phone, her instruction sounding almost like a command. She made a new playlist for him – songs to pump him up before the big game tomorrow. They'd be going up against Wheaton North. It's a crucial match. A win would mean a trip to state championship, and it's been almost five years since the last time their school had reached that far. A win will also mean more press for Tobias and the rest of the seniors in the team. Surely, there'd be agents and college recruiters on the lookout for the next football star.

"Demanding aren't you?" Tobias chuckles. He turns the volume on his speakers up a bit so Tris could hear what he's playing. "Happy?"

"Do you like it?"

"Yup," Tobias answers. "I'm actually syncing it on my phone right now. I didn't know you listened to hip hop."

"Hey, I listen to everything and anything," she retorts a bit defensively. It's something she takes seriously. Being a music blogger and all, Tris loves to think of herself as a curator of great music.

"Yeah, but not much. You're more of a country and alternative kind of girl." Tris hears a clattering noise from Tobias's end of the line. "Sorry 'bout that. I knocked down my coin box. Anyway, I like this. Thanks for including some Nirvana here."

"Well," she traces the keys on her laptop. "_I see you from your window, you know. You're talking to Four again. God, does he have a special connection to your phone or something. I can't get through," _Christina rants on her Skype message. "I know what you listen to, so…" Tris trails off. Tobias will understand what she's trying to say. They know each other well enough to finish each other's sentences. It's something from all the years of friendship they've shared.

Tobias moved into the house next to hers with his mother, Evelyn, when she was in third grade. Being two years older, Tobias was more Caleb's friend at first. Together the two of them teased her to no end. As time went by though, they've gotten closer. Tris considers him as one of her best friends.

"_I'll call you later. Okay?" _Tris replies to Christina. She looks out her window waving her hand at Christina. She lives in the house across hers.

"_You better. I have something to tell you", _her best girl friend replies. Briefly, she wonders what Chris will be telling her. Maybe something about Will again? She really can't understand why she asks her for advice when she's never had a boyfriend. _Well, that's more because you're hung up on someone_, Tris somehow admits to herself.

"Hey, you haven't answered my question yet," Tobias's voice brings her back to reality. "Have you thought about what Ms. Wu told you?"

Ms. Wu talked to her the other day about her grades and early graduation. She really hasn't thought about it much. "I think—" Tris starts only to be cut off by Tobias.

"Umm…Tris? Nita's calling me."

Tris can't help it, she rolls her eyes. Nita – head cheerleader, Tobias's girlfriend of three months, and resident mean girl – she's the reason why they hadn't had as much time as they used to. The other girl had made it a point to occupy the rest of Tobias's free time, which wasn't all that plenty to begin with, and Tris knows she takes a great pleasure in doing it. Nita hates the closeness she shares with her boyfriend. No, scratch that, Nita hates her and quite frankly Tris doesn't give a fuck about it. Their enmity is mutual, so all's even on that end.

"It's okay," she says withholding another eye roll, "Christina's waiting for my call anyway. Might as well ring her now."

"I'm sorry Tris," Tobias's voice sounds a bit unsteady. She hears him clear his throat. "Hey, you're going to watch the game tomorrow, right?"

"Of course, silly!" Tris chuckles. "I promised you I'll be there. Caleb's going, too. I'll see you tomorrow."

"Okay, tomorrow," he says. "Good night, Tris."

"Good night, Tobias. And, hey, good luck tomorrow, okay. You guys can do it." She smiles hoping that somehow he could hear it in her voice.

"Thanks. That means a lot…" Tobias pauses, "it means a lot especially coming from you."

_What is that supposed to mean? _Tris wanted to ask but can't bring herself to. A few more seconds and Tobias had hung up after saying good night to her again. She dials Christina's number.

"About time!" Chris's pitchy voice comes through the line. "I swear, you and Four talk on the phone like boyfriend and girlfriend. Why aren't you two together?"

"Because I only get to talk to him on the phone now," Tris answers with a sigh. "Anyway, what's up? What's your news?"

Christina snickers. "The bitch, Nita. She'd been talking about you again. I almost punched her."

"She's not worth your time and energy, Chris," Tris lets out a short laugh. She wouldn't want Christina to get in trouble because of her but it still feels good knowing you have that kind of friend, someone who would stand up and defend you. "What is it about now?"

"I think she and Four are fighting again," Christina huffs. "She said that you were stealing away her boyfriend, as if there's anything left to steal. She's only giving him more reason to walk away."

"Well, it's not really our problem. Just let her be. I don't really care what she says anymore." Tris knows there isn't any truth behind Nita's claims. If anything, it only proves how insecure she is – insecure and immature. Tobias deserves so much more, someone better. _Why can't it be her? Why can't he belong with her?_

Tris shakes her head willing away all those negative thoughts. "Hey, my parents are out on a date and Caleb's at the movies with Susan. You wanna come over? I have new movies on DVD."

"Okay," the other girl answers with much excitement. "Then I'll dress you up for tomorrow's game." Tris groans and Christina hears it. "Oh, shut up! You still owe me for skipping on our mall date last week."

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Tris thought she would miss the game. Caleb got stuck in traffic on his way home from picking up their mother. Needless to say, it created some sort of domino effect. By the time they got to the stadium, it was already half time. It was a tough game, but their school still won by a point.

The field's empty now. Everyone's gone to the victory party to celebrate. Christina almost dragged her, too, but she wanted some time alone to herself so she stayed. Tris promised she'll be following her, though.

It's almost weird how quiet it is now when just a half hour ago the whole place was packed up to the ceiling.

Someone drapes a jacket across her shoulders. "It's cold. You should have worn something warmer than that long-sleeved shirt." Tris didn't even notice that she's already hugging herself to keep warm. This Fall feels more chilly than the last one.

"Hey," Tris greets Tobias. "I'm sorry I didn't see you before the game. Caleb had to pick mom up from the hospital."

"It's fine. Is she alright?" Tobias asks worried.

"She is. She was just there to visit a sick friend."

Feeling the cold breeze, she puts her arms through the sleeves of the jacket draped over her shoulders. Tobias hands her a bottle of Gatorade. It's not cold anymore. She still takes it.

"Sorry, it's the only thing I have. Don't worry, that's clean," Tobias chuckles.

"I didn't say anything about it not being clean," she rolls her eyes before taking a drink. Both of them fall silent for a while, just staring at the field.

Finally, Tobias breaks the silence. "You haven't answered my question yet, Tris."

"Hmm," she raises an eyebrow, "what question?"

"Are you going to take that early graduation thing Ms. Wu talked with you about?"

"I think…" Tris pauses gathering her thoughts together, "I don't think I would. Caleb's already going to college a year early. I don't want to leave my parents too soon. Besides, I don't know what to do yet and if I could get two more years to decide, then I would take that."

"But it's a great opportunity for you."

"I could say the same about you. You could have left last year but you didn't."

"I have my reasons, Tris," Tobias exhales loudly.

"And so do I. I want to graduate with Christina and the rest of my friends," she smiles at him. "Shouldn't you be celebrating with the team? There's a party, right?"

"I don't want to celebrate yet, not until we get State," he shrugs. "I'll drop by though. I promised Zeke."

"Where's Nita?"

"I don't know," Tobias purses his lips, something he does whenever he's holding back something.

"Really? You don't know where your girlfriend is?" Tris goads him, hoping to make him talk.

Tobias looks away from her then takes a deep breath. For a while, Tris thought she might have said something wrong. She was about to apologize when Tobias turns back to sit beside her again.

"We broke up," he says, his voice unaffected.

"Why?" Tris places a hand on his forearm. It makes him look at her.

"Because she said something about someone I really care about," he answers staring directly at her eyes. Tris's heart starts beating fast. "It wasn't working anyway. I shouldn't have gone out with her in the first place."

"I thought you like her." She brings her eyes down to her lap.

"I thought I could like her," Tobias lifts her chin up making Tris look at him again. "But there's this girl I've liked since tenth grade. We're really close and I got scared I might chase her away if I tell her I like her so I didn't, I kept things to myself." He laughs a bit. "As you can see, it didn't work out. Really didn't do me any good."

"Who do you like?" Tris's voice is shaky now. She's more nervous than she thought.

Tobias quirks one eyebrow up, questioning her. "Really, Tris? You aren't that dense." He laughs then draws her to him, putting an arm around her waist. He places a gentle kiss on her temple.

"Me?" she asks, disbelief in her voice. He nods then twines their hands together. He has long, narrow fingers; hands made for fine, deft movements. She feels her cheeks warm at his simple declaration. "But I'm younger. I'm not pretty," Tris rambles. "I –" He cuts her off with another kiss, this time on her cheek.

"Yeah, like all those things matter." He pulls away still smiling. "I like you, Tris. And it was stupid trying to stay away from you." Tobias leans forward, their foreheads touching. For a moment they stay like that, eyes closed and smiles on their faces, sharing the same air.

"Can I kiss you?"

"Yes."

Tobias touches her face then leans down, brushing her lips with his. Tris could feel her hands trembling. _Stop it, she chastises herself, Oh god, I hope he didn't notice that_. She feels him press his mouth to hers gently at first then slowly building up, his lips firmer against hers. Without even thinking about it, Tris wraps an arm around Tobias, one hand sliding up his neck and into his short hair, making him smile into their kiss. They kiss for a few more minutes never minding the cold night air and the empty stadium.

"You want pizza? We could check out the party for a while, stay five minutes just so Christina and Zeke see us," Tobias suggests after they've managed to pull away from each other. Tris notices the slight flush on his cheeks.

"Yeah, I'm good with that." She takes the hand Tobias offers her, standing up from her bench seat. They walk hand in hand out of the stadium and into the parking lot. They've started something new tonight, both of them, and it feels so right.


	5. Us and Ourselves

**A/N:** I wrote this just now. I have been working on a something for a different song, but this just came on shuffle while I was still thinking how to make that other one work.

In general, this piece was inspired by Morning Parade's "**_Us and Ourselves"_**. I've posted it on my tumblr - herbrightoceaneyes - if you want to check it out. This is just me toying around one of my what ifs, in which both Tris and Tobias stay in Abnegation. In this short, the war on Abnegation still hasn't happened yet. It's about three months after Tris's initiation. I'll let you imagine the rest. =)

* * *

The light from the candle flickers in and out, making shadows on the wall across Tris. She checks her watch, the only adornment allowed in Abnegation, and see that it's already a bit pass 1:00 AM. Tobias should have been here an hour ago, but he isn't and it's making Tris more than worried. Thoughts go through her head – _What if someone had seen him? What if they've been reported?_ It's not helping her, not even a bit.

It started during her initiation.

With Caleb choosing Erudite, Tris had no choice but to stay. Tobias was her initiation instructor. A full two years ahead of her, he's already being groomed to become a leader. Being Marcus Eaton's son gives you that advantage. _Or pressure you into something you don't want to do,_ Tris adds mentally.

Tobias is every bit a model Abnegation citizen – selfless and quiet – but beneath the grey robes, he's so much more. Not everyone saw that, saw him, but she did and he's everything Tris wanted to be. He's smart and brave and kind, and even if he's still struggling to, he can also be honest. At least with her, he's trying to.

Tris doesn't know how it happened, but it just did. She was a traveler and he is her Northern Star, and they found each other in the middle of a faction that has always done their best to disappear among the rest. The rest, as they all say, is history.

A knock brings her back to the reality of her dim living room followed by the voice of the one person she'd been waiting for all night. "Tris, open up. Quick."

Tris gets up from her seat on the couch and almost trips on her own foot to open the door. Tobias slips inside, closes and locks the door, then draws her to him in one fluent move. He smells like a night run, cool and calming.

"Where'd you been? I have been waiting for you?"

"I went to see my mother," he answers her as they both move towards the couch. "I was hoping she'd help us stop whatever the Erudite are planning to do." It was information Tobias gave her only a month ago, an information which surprised her. Everyone thought Evelyn Eaton, or as she goes by now, Evelyn Johnson is dead, has long been dead. She even attended her funeral with the rest of her family. But it turned out to be all a sham, a cover-up meant to protect Marcus's reputation.

"What did she say?" Tris moves closer to Tobias, their knees touching now.

"Nothing," his voice is strained. He stands up and starts pacing in front of her. "She doesn't care, Tris. In fact, she's counting on it, waiting for it to happen. She wants the factions to destroy one another so she could make her own moves and seize control of the city. She and her band of factionless." Tobias runs a hand through his hair in frustration.

"We'd think of something," she says although Tris isn't sure whatever that something is. She grabs Tobias's hand as he passes in front of her for the nth time.

"We're running out of time."

Tris rises to her feet. Mustering all her confidence, she says, "Hey, we're going to figure something out. Don't' forget my Mom knows about this, too. She'll help us."

Tobias relaxes a little at her words. You would have thought he wouldn't care anymore what happens to Abnegation after going through what he did with his father, but here he is still worried sick about the same people who might have condemned him to this life. And it makes Tris want him even more, this selfless boy in front of her.

"It's all going to be okay, Tobias," she whispers even though she doesn't have to. Tris puts both of her hands on either sides of his face. Standing on her toes, she places a gentle kiss on his lips. "This whole city could burn itself to dust, but you and me, we're going to be alright. We're going to make it out alive."

Tris knows even before she said it that she'll do anything and everything to protect the people she loves and cares for. She'll take them away from this god-forsaken city, and keep them safe. Looking at Tobias, Tris is sure he will do the same.

"We will," he says just before pressing his lips against hers, this time more insistent. This is something the world will never be able to take away from them, and in that moment, everything fits into place. She needs him just as much as he needs her, and they'll do everything for each other.


	6. Is There Something I Can Do

**A/N:** I wrote this last week during Veteran's Day but I did not finish it until tonight. This is me taking a short breather away from my other story, Find Your Way Back. If you would check it out and leave a review, I would really appreciate it.

Anyway, the song that pushed me to write this - other than Veteran's Day - is Five Star Iris's "Is There Something I Can Do." You check it out on YouTube. I also posted it on my tumblr page - herbrightoceaneyes - just add the necessary extensions to complete the URL.

* * *

_Whoever made the claim that words could ease the pain_  
_Never watched your tears fill up an ocean_  
_Never saw your face the moment you found out_  
_That you'd have to live without until heaven_

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The day comes in swatches of colors – greens and golds, blues and browns – a refreshing sight that goes well with the warm summer they are experiencing right now. Tobias savors it, rolling the windows of their truck down to let the air in. Tris seems to be enjoying it, too. She'd disassembled her messy bun, and she looks golden with the morning sunlight on her skin and hair. Even if it's already been seven years since the faction wars and the end of the experiments, Chicago is still on the mend and their involvement with the new government meant longer hours being trapped inside the boring concrete grays of the city.

This is good for both of them.

They do this every year on the same day - the day the new members of each faction were supposed to pick their jobs, the day Abnegation fell on the hands of mind-controlled Dauntless – the anniversary of Andrew and Natalie Prior's deaths.

For the first two years, Tris couldn't even bring herself to say a few words about her family and how she feels about them. She'd just stare at the land where the loyal Dauntless and the remaining Abnegation buried the dead, crying silent tears. Time, though it doesn't heal you completely, has a way of stitching you up and making things easier, bearable. That's how it is now.

Tris catches him looking at her. She smiles at him, sweet and loving, her hand settling down over his on the gear stick. He brings it up to his lips, kissing her knuckles then her ring, the partner of the one on his own finger.

"You feeling okay?" He asks her, concern crinkling his brows.

"I'm fine, Tobias. Don't worry about me." Tris squeezes his hand in reassurance. He nods taking her words for it. They slow down to a stop near the marble memorial the city have erected for its lost members. He gets out of the truck and hurries towards the passenger side to assist Tris.

"You go ahead. I'll be right behind you," he tells her.

"Don't forget the flowers in the backseat." Tris starts to walk toward the marble wall. He gets the bouquet of white lilies and locks the doors before following his wife.

They're not the only ones paying their respects. A few other people are already around the memorial offering silent prayers and laying down flowers for their lost loved ones. Tobias greets them with a polite nod, sometimes a smile.

"My parents would have been so happy seeing people help each other, especially Mom. Caleb would have probably over-analyzed things and go on great lengths just to explain the psychology behind selflessness," Tris says without looking at him. Tobias would have thought she's ruminating over sad thoughts if it weren't for the smile on her face. She's honestly thinking about what her family would do, how they would react to this new world they're living in.

"Caleb would have been a great teacher, but it would also be easy for his students to goof around in his class. Your brother kind of zones out whenever he's into deep explaining something."

"I still wish they could have seen this," she gestures around them, "all of it."

"I wish that, too." Tobias puts a hand over Tris's narrow shoulder in what he hopes is a comforting gesture. "More so now than ever before." His hand slides down to her arms before going around her waist and settling on top of his wife's abdomen.

They've only found out they were pregnant two weeks ago. After two years of marriage and a year of trying to conceive, it was surely a happy news for both of them. By that time, Tris is already eight weeks along, her usually flat stomach showing a slight bump under her loose dress. They haven't told their friends yet. So far, only Evelyn knows. Tris wanted to go visit the memorial before they do so.

"I'd love to think my family will be overjoyed with our news. They'd be happy for both of us, happy and excited." Tris twists her body slightly so she could look at him. "And I still maintain my position on them loving you as their own son."

He presses his lips on her temple, smelling her sweet scent – ripe apples and cool night breeze – letting it flood him with calm. Tris had always had that effect on him.

"I dreamt about them last night. They were all together. Mom, Dad, Caleb. I don't remember if they talked to me, or what. All I can recall after I woke up was their smiling faces and the feeling the dream left me. I feel happy. I feel at peace.

"I've accepted that they've gone somewhere else now, somewhere I can't follow them to. I think I've had years ago," Tris reaches out for his hand with the flowers. He hands him one of the bouquets. "But I still miss them, Tobias."

"Of course you still do. You love them, Tris. It doesn't mean you have to stop loving them just because they're gone."

He could have said more. He wanted to say more, but eloquence had never been his forte; expressing himself had always been one of his weakest spots. Giving out a speech in front of a hundred people he does not know is easier than telling Tris how he feels.

He draws his wife to his side, gently squeezing her shoulder before letting her go again. Tris gives him a small smile before walking towards the marble memorial. Tobias watches as she lays a gentle hand over her family's engraved names, closing her eyes in silent conversation. He does the same, wordlessly promising her parents and her brother that he'll take of their girl, love her with everything he has until the very last second he has in this world; that he'll keep her and their child safe, protect them with his own life if he has to. He lays down the flowers he'd been holding once he's finished. It takes Tris a few minutes more before she does the same.

"Ready to go?" He asks her with a tender voice.

"Yes."

Tobias holds out a hand for Tris. She takes it, lacing their fingers together. They both start walking back to their truck.

"I told them what our baby's name will be," she tells him while he helps her up to her seat.

"Yeah?" He smiles at her, encouraging Tris to tell him more.

"Andrew for a boy and Natalie for a girl. We'd still have to think about second names. I promised Caleb I'd fit his name in, too."

"That's good then," Tobias chuckles. He closes the passenger's side door. "We have the whole day to discuss baby names."


	7. I'm Not Missing You

**A/N**: I don't know how to apologize anymore for not updating any of my WIPs here. If you're also following Find Your Way Back, please know that I am working on chapter 13. Life has just gotten in the way of writing, and as much as I would love to spend all of my days typing away on my computer or reading book after book, I can't because I have bills and loans to pay. Work is the biggest monster chasing after me right now.

That said, I wrote this one because (1) I needed practice [I haven't written anything else the past two months other than progress reports and boring technical stuff] and (2) I needed something light. This one is inspired by _I'm Not Missing You _by Stacie Orrico. The song is up on my new Tumblr account - ourblue-eyedheroine. I deleted my old one, which was linked to my personal main account because my personal account got compromised.

Here's hoping I could go back here soon.

* * *

"I'm surprised you still have all these stuff. I thought you threw them all out." Christina holds up a box full of letters, notes and photos.

"I just didn't have the time to dispose them," Tris replies without looking at the tall girl beside her, mind and hands busy with the task at hand. She isn't sure what pushed her - maybe it was Christina threatening to create a Tinder account for her or it could be Caleb calling her pathetic, which hurt coming from her brother – but, finally, after ten months of going through the almost endless cycle of anger, sulking around and self-pity, Tris has found the energy to get rid of everything and anything connected to Peter.

"More like you were holding onto all these junk like a lifeline when, in fact, they're actually more like deadweight. They've only held you back, Tris." Her best friend picks up a picture of her and Peter from the pile that's already inside the rusty old drum she and Caleb found in their parents' garage. She hopes they don't mind her using them.

"When you first started going out, I didn't understand what you saw in him and that still remains the same for me. I don't intend to offend you, but as your best friend it is my duty to tell you the truth and the truth is that Peter looks like the dumbass assistant of the leader of a drug syndicate in a comedy movie. The one that gets himself killed because he fires the gun at himself accidentally. I mean, look at that face," Christina shows her the photo she is holding, "that has got to be the most assholey smile I've ever seen."

Tris can't help it, she laughs, hard. It brings tears at the corners of her eyes and makes her gasp for air. She clearly remembers her mother telling her younger self that it's wrong to make fun of people for the way they look, but there's just something cathartic about it when it involves someone who've hurt you. Also, her best friend just has a really funny way of putting things in perspective for her. Tris wonders why she hadn't listened to her when she warned her that Peter was bad news.

"Come to think of it, he deserved to have his face," she tells Christina. "A face of an asshole for an asshole."

Both girls double over with laughter, their arms around their stomachs as if that could help them control themselves. That's how Caleb found them.

"If you girls could tone it down a little bit, that would be great. I have friends over, you know." It sounds like a warning but, with a smile gracing his amiable face, Tris knows her brother is happy to see her laughing. He won't even mind all the noise she and Christina are making.

"Tris was just getting rid of some garbage."

"That's great. About damn time," Caleb says. "Who does he think he is? Telling you he misses you, asking you back after cheating on you numerous times. He doesn't deserve you."

"Caleb, no one would ever deserve me if it were up to you." Tris rolls her eyes making her brother chuckle. It's true, though, no one would ever be good enough for her in Caleb's eyes. She'd told him time and again that she doesn't need his protection, but it must be something inherent to every single older brother – being overprotective (most times) and being an annoying jerk (sometimes).

"Whatever," Caleb turns around ready to go back inside their house. "You can join us, if you want. We have pizza and hot wings. By the way, Chris, Will is on the phone waiting for you."

"Tell him I'll call him back. We're almost finished anyway."

"No," Tris shakes her head, "go talk to Will. You two haven't seen each other for months. I'd be good here."

"You sure?"

"Yeah," she gives her a smile. "I'm sure I can handle it. Just bring me the gas can after you're done talking to Will."

Christina gives her one last lingering look before nodding and following Caleb inside. Tris continues to tear some of her old letters into smaller pieces. It would make it easier for the fire to engulf it later once she lights it up. Just like the Olympic ceremonial torch, Tris wants it to signify the start of a new chapter in her life. With every torn up scrap she drops inside the old drum comes vows to be braver and stronger for herself and the people around her.

She lets herself get lost in her task, so when the kitchen door slams shut, Tris startles. A hand over her rapidly-beating heart, she whips around expecting to see either Christina or Caleb, but instead she's met with the most interesting blue eyes she had ever seen in her entire life.

"I'm so sorry. I didn't mean to scare you," the boy starts to apologize. For a while all Tris could do is stare as she tries to calm down her wild heart. She takes the sight of him in. He must be one of Caleb's friends, but he certainly looks older than her brother, probably a couple of years give or take. Tall, lean body, wavy dark brown hair, full lips and chiseled jawline – he is definitely good-looking. Tris didn't know his brother has friends like him. She thought Caleb only went with the smart types complete with preppy clothes and glasses.

"It's fine. I'm just a bit out of it, I guess," she manages to smile at him.

"Your brother asked me to give you this," Blue Eyes raises the gas can for her to see. "What d'you need it for anyway?"

"I just have to get rid of some unwanted stuff, is all."

"Let me help you," he offers and Tris tells him to pour some gasoline over the things that are already inside the drum. He spots one photo of her and Peter sitting on top of the pile, the same one Christina showed her ealier, and she swears she sees him smirk.

"Must have been one hell of a break up if you're burning every photo you have of him."

"And love letters," she adds. "I'm burning those, too."

"I'm not gonna ask you what he did because I'm sure you wouldn't want to relive it but, whatever it is, I'm glad you're moving on."

Normally, she would be on the defense after hearing a remark like that but the words sounded genuine and sincere coming from this stranger. Her lips start to turn up on their own volition and she surprises even herself when she starts laughing.

"Most of my brother's friends ride their own high horses with their stuck-up, know-it-all noses up in the air and I'm not sure if you're also like them, but I kinda like you."

He laughs along with her, a new friendship already forming between them. Blue Eyes holds out his hand to her.

"Tobias."

"Tris, but you probably know that because of Caleb."

"Yeah," he chuckles, "he talks about you sometimes. You wanna get started with your pyre of revenge?" Tris nods and fishes out the box of matches from her pocket.

"I have an idea. How about you light up one picture with just your ex in it to start the fire?"

"Know what? That's fucking brilliant."


	8. Ours

**A/N:** So, this came up while I was trying to draft FYWB Ch. 13 and it just won't go away. Note to self: don't talk to kid sister about Taylor Swift while writing. She'll plant a plot bunny in your head.

This one was inspired by two songs: _Ours_ by Taylor Swift (because her songs, esp the old ones are just so easy to write around) and_ Fuck 'Em Only We Know_ by BANKS. But since Taylor's songs influenced the majority of this one-shot more, I'm going to use it for the title. Both tracks are posted on my new tumblr account, btw - ourblue-eyedheroine. You can check it out if you like.

RE: Find Your Way Back, for those who also read it...I finished the first part and am drafting the second part. I apologize for the very long wait. I've just been really busy preparing for this big thing that I have in June but I will definitely not abandon it. Again, thank you to all of you who have been following, favoriting and reviewing my stories. You don't have any idea how much they brighten my mostly stressful days. So THANK YOU! I wish I could hug all of you and bake you cookies.

* * *

"There. Done," Lauren, her make-up artist, tells Tris taking one step back to admire her work.

She inspects her reflection in the mirror set in front of her – shimmery white eyeshadow on her lids, red the deep color of rubies stain her lips, a light blush dusts her cheeks, waves of golden hair sways and bounces with every movement of her head. It looks so simple at first glance you'd never expect that she had to sit still for hours just to let her team create the whole look.

Dress up, smile and wave, stop for photos, play nice with the media – for ten years, this has been what most of her life is made out from. _You wanted thi__s_, she tells herself. _You've been dreaming about this since you were a child. __This is your one big break_. It's true, she wanted this – have been waiting for it – this one big break.

For as long as she could remember, Tris had always wanted to be in a movie and she was determined to fulfill her dreams even as a child. She was six years old when she landed her first modeling gig. A year later, she starred in her very first TV commercial. Jeanine, her agent turned manager, found her not long after that.

As with almost everyone in the industry, she started with small roles – the kid playing with the child of the story's leads, the little girl having a meltdown in the grocery where the female protagonist is shopping – then she started getting minor roles. She was ten when she finally snatched the title role in the then-upcoming Disney show, their modern version of the Kit Kittredge books.

It was a very happy time in her life and her parents were all for it as long as she does not leave and still get good grades at school and, most important of all, she is having fun doing all her acting stuff. Both Natalie and Andrew made it clear to her that she doesn't have to work for their family. Her father's small software company provides them with more than enough to live comfortably in Chicago. But it was fun, acting was. It's like playing pretend only with cameras rolling and recording her while she plays with other kids and, sometimes, a few adults, and so she continued.

Lately, however, things have started to become a little too overwhelming for her. What once was a fun game for her slowly turned into a job which dragged her around crazy circles. Her work necessitated moving away from home and into her Grandma Edith's place in LA a couple of months before she started high school. It was fine at first. She told herself she would make it work but as the days go by she finds it more and more difficult. She misses her friends and her family, misses home and the peace it offers her, something that the City of Angels would never give her even if it tried. She feels hounded, her every move watched and dissected. Tris can't help feeling like a doll in someone else's doll house.

"So," Lauren draws out the word. She doesn't look at her, instead the make-up artist's eyes are staring at the girl in the mirror, her made up image.

"What do you think?"

Tris pulls a slow deep breath and plasters on one of the brightest smiles she could muster. She will have time later for her own thoughts, now though she has an obligation to fulfill.

"It's perfect."

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

"We're almost to the theater now," she starts to type on her phone. Tris could feel Jeanine's intent gaze bore into her. Still, she ignores her manager and continue writing her message for Tobias. "Pray that I don't trip on the red carpet. That would be hella embarrassing." She sends it as soon as she finishes wanting to read his reply before they have to step out of their car.

"It's that Four guy again, am I right?" Jeanine challenges her to deny the truth lifting one perfectly arched brow to scare her. The trick doesn't work on Tris anymore. She's just plain tired of all the rules and hearing the same reprimands again and again.

"I told you, Beatrice," the older woman starts again when she doesn't say anything, "that boy is bad news for your reputation. Besides, who on earth goes by with a number for a name. That's got to be either a marketing strategy to set himself apart from all the other guitar-bearing rock stars, or it's just a really stupid nickname."

Tris swears she almost bites her tongue off from holding back her own barrage of insults towards her manager. She and Tobias have been through this already. He asked her not to defend him, something that she so staunchly negated. "It's not worth fighting her for," he told her just the other night, "she has her mind made up about me and there's nothing I could do or say to change that. Besides, as Zeke always says, those who matter don't mind and those who mind don't matter. All the important people in my life, those who really matter, know the real me. I don't have to explain myself to everyone else. The rest of the world could go fuck themselves and I won't even give a damn."

"He doesn't need any special marketing strategy to sell his music. The guy's great!" Robert, his co-star and friend speaks up for probably the first time tonight. He, too, has been under a whole lot of pressure the past couple of weeks doing press junkets and several meet-and-greets for their movie. "And I think the name Four is cool. He must have been one hell of a football player for the name to stick."

"Yeah, he was." Tris manages to smile, a real one this time.

"Still, that doesn't change the fact that-"

"This is not up for discussion, Jeanine," she cuts her manager off. "I only hired you to manage my career, not my life. You are overstepping your boundaries."

"Fine," Jeanine calmly says, "but when the time comes I'd hate to be the one to tell you that I told you so."

Tris watches her open the door and get out of the car just as her phone lights up with Tobias' message.

"Give 'em hell, Tris." That's all he says, but it gives her enough courage and energy to get through the night.

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

She didn't trip, thank god! Everything went well and Tris has put the heated exchange of words with Jeanine earlier behind them. She only has to finish up with the press conference, stay a few minutes at the party for the cast and crew then she could go back to her hotel and rest. Tris can't wait enough for this night to be over and done with already. She is beyond exhausted.

"You okay?" Robert asks all while setting down a bottle of water in front of her. She smiles her thanks.

"Tired, but happy. Can't wait to go back to my room though and sleep."

Her friend laughs and Tris finds herself laughing along. In the background, cameras go off capturing the moment. She could already imagine the article titles - "Tris Prior and Robert Black Dating?" "_How to Love_ co-stars Share Sweet Moment in Movie Premiere" - it jars her back to reality.

"Ditto. I just want to take this itchy suit off, have a warm shower then sleep. Don't get me wrong. It was nice working with you, Tris, but I'm just glad this would soon be over. I could use a vacation."

"Don't worry, I understand." She fingers the charms on her bracelet, Tobias' gift for her on her last birthday. "You should totally go on a vacation. You deserve it."

"You should, too," Robert winks at her. "Maybe go on a trip with Four. He's about to end his tour, right?"

"Yes," Tris thinks about it for a while. "Maybe I will."

For the next 30 minutes she and the rest of the cast and staff present talked about the movie. They were asked the usual questions – the most challenging scene, hers and Robert's crossover from TV to film, what it was like to work with a veteran director. They were all fairly easy to answer especially since they've been doing press for weeks now. She practically has her responses memorized by heart.

"Ms. Prior," one man with shaggy black hair calls her attention and Tris turns to acknowledge him. This guy she hasn't seen before.

"Is it true that you're still dating Four even though your management has warned you not to?"

A lump lodges itself in the middle of her throat and Tris clenches her hands into a tight fist, her manicured nails digging into her palm. She throws Jeanine a look. She thought it was clear to her that she won't be answering any personal questions; she even had it written in all of her contracts.

"Is it true? People have been talking about how much a bad influence he is to you. Not two weeks ago you were seen partying and drinking with him and your other friends. What do you have to say about this?" The man presses on as the conference moderator struggles to keep control of the situation asking the other reporters to quiet down. She feels a hand on her elbow, Robert's.

"You don't have to answer that," he whispers.

She looks around the room searching for her family. They all have worry and concern painted on their faces when her eyes finally land on them. Her mother gives her a small smile before mouthing the same words she has always held on to, her one truth. _I love you._

Action, showing the people that you love them, always would weigh more for her, but sometimes words are also needed.

"Yes," Tris speaks into her microphone, "we're still together."

It was the very first time Tris has ever spoken about her private life. Even after a decade in the business, she has managed to keep most of her private life, well, private. She's breaking her own code of silence tonight, for Tobias she will. He is her one exception.

"But we thought you broke up with him," someone, she doesn't know who, asks from their audience.

"We never broke up. We were just busy with our commitments. He has his album, which he is touring for, and I have _How to Love_. But we always talk and chat every chance we get." She lets out a short laugh. "Puts all our gadget and technology into good use, don't you agree?"

You'd think that answer would shut the reporters up, but, instead, more questions were thrown at her. For a long while everything is all bright flashes of light and jumbled-up words, until she has had enough. Clearing her throat, Tris silences the whole room.

"I think," she begins, her voice a little shaky. Tris bites her lips certain about what she wants to say but not sure about how to start. From the corner, she sees her father nod encouragingly at her. She grips the mic in her hands firmer this time.

"I think we're all too quick to judge other people. Images are, well, they are only images. They are a part of us but they are not everything that we are. To tell you the truth, I hate it because it only compounds me into just one tiny side of myself and I know there's more of me to show. It's the same thing with Four."

She takes a deep breath, turning her head to look straight into Jeanine's cold, calculating eyes. She would give her an earful later for this little stunt of hers once the conference is over. Tris doesn't care.

"I could try to convince all of you that he is not what you think he is, that he is aloof not because he thinks he's better than everyone else but because he's not used to people knowing him everywhere he goes. I could tell you that he is not a bad influence but you won't believe me because you'll choose to go with the truth of the photos taken by paparrazi who intentionally follow him around waiting for him to do something stupid.

"And, I think, every one has the right to choose who to love and who they want to be with. We're not living in the 18th century anymore," Tris smiles and shrugs. "It's how love works."

Robert, recognizing the segue way, quickly goes in for it redirecting the reporters' attention away from Tris and back to the movie by talking about story themes and their characters. Tris takes a sip from her water then, reminding herself to thank her co-star later.

She doesn't give a damn about her squeaky clean reputation now. It could burn down with her wholesome image. Tris has said her piece, finally, and it feels truly liberating.

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

"Are you still having fun doing this?" Caleb stands up from the living chair. Jeanine tried to talk to her alone but her family never left her side after the press conference. They went with her at the party, stayed for about half an hour before going back to her hotel room where they had a very nice and satisfying dinner. She had a feeling they were shielding her, from what exactly, she doesn't know.

"For the most part, yes," Tris gives her brother a warm smile. "I'm not just great at the whole press thing. But don't worry about me, Bear. I can handle things myself. I'm tough, you know."

Caleb laughs a hearty laugh, one of the things she misses most about him. "We know you are, Bumble, and if the world needed more proof of that, then they've gotten it."

"You were very brave tonight, my dear," her mother draws her in for a hug, "and we are proud of you. Always have, always will." Caleb joins them in while his father smiles fondly down at them.

"We will leave you to rest, Beatrice," Andrew puts one large hand on Natalie's shoulder. "We'll see you again tomorrow."

"Yes, dad."

"You did very well today. Don't let anyone tell you otherwise," her father's Adam's apple bobs as he swallows. "And you should think about replacing that manager of yours. What's her name? Jenny? Janice?"

"Jeanine, dad. Her name's Jeanine," Tris chuckles. "And yes, I will think about it."

With one last hug, they leave her. She walks around the suite to her bedroom for that night. Tris promptly flops down the bed relishing the soft cushion of the blankets and mattress. Her feet ache from wearing high heels the whole night. Tris lifts her right leg up wriggling her toes, doing the same thing to her other leg. She stretches her limbs the way a cat does willing away the soreness of her muscles. She grabs her phone from the nightstand.

Three missed calls and a handful of texts – that is what greets her when she unlocks her screen. All of the calls were from Tobias, same thing with most of the messages. She ignores the ones from Jeanine.

"Call you in 3? :)" She replies to one of her boyfriend's frantic texts. His reply was immediate. "OK, waiting." Tris exits out of the conversation and types in a message for Robert thanking him for everything he'd done for her earlier. She doesn't get any response back, which is fine by her. Robert must be sleeping or maybe still out partying. It's really not a big deal. They'll see each other again tomorrow anyway. Tris excitedly dials Tobias' number. He picks up on the first ring.

"Are you okay? I heard about the conference and I'm worried. My roadie''s girlfriend watched it from Google Livestream and she told me about your speech." She swears he says everything in one breath. Tris breaks out into a fit of laughter. "What? Why are you laughing? What's so funny? Tris, are you going crazy?"

Wiping away moisture from her eyes, she says, "Maybe I am crazy. I can't believe I said all those stuff there. God, you should have seen their faces. It was like lecturing kids at detention. It feels so good, Tobias."

"Well, I'm glad to hear you're fine," he hears him chuckle.

"Why wouldn't I be? You sound as if I took a hundred foot jump down a bridge," Tris teases.

"Your words were even more dauntless than the insane bridge leap you're talking about. It straddles the line between idiocy and bravery." Tobias' voice turns serious. "Some people will not like it."

" 'The people who matter don't mind and the people who mind don't matter,' right? That's what you said," she sighs, dropping her body back down again on her bed. "I really don't care anymore, Tobias. I'm so tired of having people control my every move, my every decision. I think it's time I start thinking for myself. I am my own business, not theirs, so I will run it the way I best see it fit."

"I know. Trust me, I understand, but you don't have to-"

"Defend you?" Tris stops him before he can continue. "I know I don't have to, but I wasn't just defending you. I was defending myself. I was defending us." A loud and heavy sigh escapes her. Today has been a real rollercoaster of emotions and she just wants to move past it.

"I didn't mean to upset you more." She hears cars and street noise in his background, and it makes her wonder where he is right now. Maybe he's walking around. He does it often after a show, walk without any particular destination, it clears his mind he said. She wants to do the same thing.

"It's fine," Tris rolls onto her stomach. "And I'm sorry, too. These past few weeks have been doubly stressful. I shouldn't take it out on you. But I don't want to talk about this anymore, Tobias."

"Okay," he says still sounding a little worried. "What do you want to talk about then?"

"Anything, tell me about your show tonight. How was it? Did Zeke and Uriah do anything crazy again?"

"The usual. We played a couple sets, sneaked out some drinks when people weren't looking. Zeke almost fell off the stage while he was playing."

"Would've been a better show if he did," she laughs.

"Now, you're being mean."

"I know I am. That's one of the things you like about me, right? Because I'm also not nice," she teases him. "Where are they anyway? I don't hear them. They're usually louder when they know you're talking to me."

"Ah," Tobias hesitates, "they're passed out. You know them."

Tris knows it is not the full truth but she let's it slide. She'd learned long ago that with Zeke and Uriah she could definitely expect the worst. If they've hooked up with some random girl, or in their case, girls, she doesn't want to hear about it.

They are both quiet for a while and she remembers what Robert said about getting away on a vacation. She would have the next three weeks free right after all the promo commitments she has for her current movie. Tobias, on the other hand, ends his tour next week.

"Let's runaway," she tells him. "I mean, let's go on a vacation. We can finally go on that Australian safari we both talked about before. We could even go to Europe. Eurail, was that it?"

"Yeah, that's it."

"C'mon, it would be fun, Tobias. You, me, our backpacks. What d'ya say?" Tris's excitement bubbles up even more when she imagines all the adventure they'd go on. "It's a great idea, right? I mean, I'd be free after my movie and your tour is almost through. Tobias, I miss you. I really, really miss you. I just want to be with you a longer time, I guess. Longer than a weekend."

"I miss you, too, Tris."

"You'll be at the New York premiere this Saturday, right?" She hates the desperation in her voice but she needs him there. She needs to be sure he'll be there even if he won't be walking along with her on the red carpet.

"Tris, you don't have to wait until the weekend," Tobias says sounding determined.

"What?"

"Open your door."

She gets up from bed, confused. What does he mean she doesn't have to wait? Does he have a surprise for her? Flowers and chocolates like the last time? She's still guessing when she finally gets to the door. Tris opens it carefully as if it's going to trigger a bomb.

"Hi," Tobias greets her with his sweet, shy smile. Surprised, it takes Tris a full minute before she jumps into his arms. She kisses his cheeks, her hands going up and down his arms checking that he's real.

"You're here," is all she could say.

"Yeah," he chuckles and the sound chips away at her exhaustion. "When I told you to give them hell, I meant show them how good of an actress you are. I didn't mean lecture the grown-ups about love and choices, but, hey, it's all good. I think most of them needed to hear Tris Prior's life lessons."

"Shut up!" Tris slaps his arm. "How could you be here? You were in Anaheim."

"Rented a car, drove here as soon as our last set was over." Tobias draws her closer again. He places a soft kiss on the top of her head. "You're not the only one in this relationship who misses someone. Besides, they've hogged more than enough of your time. I'm claiming what's mine."

Tobias pulls away from her only to lean down and gently slot his lips over hers. It's a gently kiss, one that conveys longing and gratefulness at the other's presence. It sends warmth through Tris' body so much so that she doesn't even feel the coldness of the floor on her bare feet. The kiss ends too quickly for Tris' liking and she lets out a gust of breath wanting more of him.

Tobias touches his forehead to hers, his plush mouth pressing against her cheeks. "I've missed you so much, Tris. Everything's just so crazy these days. I don't know what to do anymore," he confesses.

"As long as we know what we have, we'll be alright. You and me, okay? We'll deal with things together." She feels more than see Tobias nod his head. "I love you, Tobias. Remember that, alright?"

"I love you, too, Tris."

She smiles into the crook of his neck before pushing herself up on the tips of her toes. Tris kisses Tobias fiercely with all the happiness she feels at that moment. He kisses her back with equal fervor, his fingers carding through her hair loosening her messy bun.

"Now, about that vacation," she reminds him still breathless. Tobias bites down on his lower lip, a big grin on his handsome face.

"Won't you invite me inside first?"


	9. Find Your Way Back

**A/N:** I don't personally celebrate Father's Day, but I know a lot of people do, so I kind of came up with this thing. It's a spin to the prologue of Find Your Way Back (thus the title) only it's written primarily through Tris' eyes even though it's in third person.

I know it's been a long time since I posted anything, especially for FYWB. Real life has been, well, real - sometimes good, other times bad, then there days when it's just okay, times you're kind of in the middle. I'm not confortable sharing too much here, but rest assured, I've been getting help and am taking care of myself. I try to write as often as I can, though a lot of my drafts tend to go to the scrap bin.

Anyway, thanks goes to my friend and beta extraordinaire, Eunice339. She's just amazing. She caught all of my mistakes in the first draft and made this little thing so much better. I hope you enjoy this one even if it's pretty short. Also, the title of this chapter (and also the longer, multi-chaptered story) is from Michelle Branch song. Give it a listen if you have the time. It's a great song.

I'm at ourblue-eyedheroine on tumblr, btw. Also, I hope you all have a great day regardless whether or not you celebrate Father's day.

* * *

The day is bright and beautiful – a warm fall day by Pacific Northwest standards – and they make the most of it. Tris sits herself down under the taller of the two apple trees in their backyard, homemade bubble wand in hand, watching her husband work at putting together the swing set that is their birthday gift for Maggie while their daughter plays assistant, handing him the tools he asks for. She smiles at the sight of them.

They had never talked much about having kids when they first got together. Given how young they were back then, it isn't much of a surprise. She knew though, that at the back of his mind, Tobias had been scared to be a father – how could he not when the man he was forced to call _'father'_ only ever hurt him in every way possible? He once told her that the closest thing he had to a father was her own dad. From him, Tobias got glimpses of what a good father should be, and for that she's grateful.

"Daddy, can I invite Sam over?" Tris hears Maggie ask Tobias. "I told her I am getting my own swing for my birthday. She wanted one, too, but her parents won't get her one because she hurt herself on the swings at the playground at school, so I told her she could just come over when I have one and we can share."

"That's very nice of you, princess," he smiles down at their little girl, hand pausing over the steel chain of the swing set. He tugs at it, probably testing if he'd tightened it well. "And, of course, you can invite Sam over, but you both have to be careful. You're not allowed to play on it without an adult around."

Tris' smile widens at their exchange. Tobias is a great father to their daughter, no doubt about it. He wears it like a second skin, the love and care he has for Maggie as natural as breathing for him. Of course, there are still times when he doubts himself – times when he second-guesses the things he does for Maggie – and it is only then that she steps in, to reassure him and remind him that he's not alone; that she, herself, still feels like she doesn't know half the things she's doing. Parenting is one big cycle of trial and error.

A giggle breaks her out of her thoughts, making Tris glance toward the direction the sound came from. Maggie stands in front of her, hands on her knees and legs bent, her blue, blue eyes – so much like her father's – looking at Tris with such curiosity. Her brows furrow as if she's in deep thought before, finally, her lips widen into a grin.

"You look silly, Mommy," the little girl tells her and Tris laughs.

"Why do I look silly?"

"Because you're smiling at no one," Maggie answers. "Auntie Chris told me that only crazy people smile at no one."

"Well, your auntie can be wrong sometimes, baby. Mommy was just thinking about something happy," Tris explains. From her periphery, Tobias throws her a knowing look as he wipes the sweat away from his face. The back of his shirt is also wet with patches of it. She'll get it off of him later, definitely later once Maggie is napping. Tris clears her throat.

"Do you want to play with the bubble wand we made?"

Tris gets a resounding "_Yes!"_ as an answer, and then Maggie is out like a shot, promptly running to her father to loop him into their little game. She shakes her head, laughing under her breath at her little girl's eagerness.

Watching her husband and daughter makes her grateful for love and family and second chances, grateful for forgiveness and the ability to admit you've been wrong – for the strength to right them and the courage to try again. It may have taken both her and Tobias a while to get to where they are right now, but Tris wouldn't have it any other way. She'd gladly go through it all over again, if it means having him and Maggie in the end.

This, him and her and their daughter, all of it is theirs, and it has been that way all along.


End file.
